Need some advice on a project!

[Texas transplant]

When our daughter lost her husband, their daughter was eight years old. She didn't want anything to remind her of him. They were very close and loving. We gave her pictures , she gave them back to her mother. Lisa had frames made for some of the pictures and put them on a wall. The school planted a young tree in the lawn with a plaque in his name. Every once in awhile I go past it . It has grown to be one of the biggest trees in the school yard. But she still never says anything about him or if she remembers him. To be honest I don't think people want a rememberance, they have that in their own minds. Margaret

[Lili]

I was buying up all the Baby Love Yarn, 18 skeins, at Walmart Thurs AM, as it is being discontinued, and I love working with this yarn. A lady in front of me at checkout said I was going to be really busy. I said I made blankets for Project Linus and she said when her baby was in the NICU someone gave her a Project Linus blanket and it was the nicest gift she ever got. And then she said thank you for what you do! I thought that was such a nice thank you for the whole Project Linus organization.

Jan: Wish you had been given a soft blanket at the time. Thinking of you. Shirley

[buggainok]

I know you said a friend asked you to do this, and I am sure she is well-meaning. After reading all the responses here, and agreeing with them myself, maybe you need to let your friend know what people here have said about this idea. Especially those who have tragically lost a child.

My son died of cancer at age 50, right before Christmas. Even though he was a grown man, with children of his own, he will always be my little boy and my first child. We are not supposed to outlive our children.

Sometimes people intend to do something nice, and don't realize that it may not be the appropriate thing to do. Everyone grieves in their own way.

[Renee]

The picture frame idea is great, in my opinion. I also have made bookmarks like crosses and angels and added them to the sympathy card. I guess it all depends on the circumstances. The ones I have done it for greatly appreciated them.

[Mrs. P]

Christa I can't even imagine the pain of losing a child
but when I ran across this pattern
I saved it for sad occasions like this.
Maybe something like this little Angel would help?

Ravelry: Weeping Angel Statue pattern by Shirley MacDonald

[jcrsga]

Thank everyone for there input. And like I had said before If I have upset anyone, that was not my intention. I just know that this is such a good group of people that we could come up with something. I love all the ideas and will ask my friend what she thinks.

[Lili]

I think possibly if you do something very shortly after the funeral it might be OK. I really like the Willow Tree angels and have given several of those. However, after some time it just tends to bring everything back all over again. It is a hard thing to figure out and I think we all have to do what is in our hearts.

[ginny2228]

A picture frame is a really great idea.

[MsBhaven]

When mom passed away my brothers and I asked each of her brothers and sisters if they would like one of the angels that she had in her collection. This was hard to not only do but I know some of my uncles and aunts were touched by the thought that they could take a angel of hers home with them most of them had chosen the last angel they had given her. But I think if it had been anything other then something she had collected or made herself it would not have been the right thing to do.

[Lili]

MsBehaven: That is a really good idea. A friend of mine had a wonderful collection of angels and when she passed away her daughters did the same thing with family and friends. I had given her a beautiful ball to catch the sunlight and they gave me that back which was so nice.