Are you the Black Sheep of your family? Come on DOWN!!

[Maryd.]

Ya know, in my Mother's case, I honestly believe that she had not one clue about what she was robbing herself of or what she robbed her 3 daughters of. We missed out on so much, ALL of us in my immediate family missed out on so much. It is no wonder that I became an alcoholic and an emotional eater. I am grateful for the access I have to therapy and the information that I need to get better.

I hear ya luv.

[Landon]

Thank you, Mary! XOX


I am very grateful that all that toxic abuse is behind me, never to happen to me ever again.

[Maryd.]

Thank you, Mary! XOX


I am very grateful that all that toxic abuse is behind me, never to happen to me ever again.

Glad hun... ♥

[Sheila R]

And we're very, very happy to have you too Landon!!!

[justplainjudy]

Thanks, Amanda! You are so right! We all gotta whole lotta livin' to do as they say! So Landon and everybody get with it! I am so glad I joined this Crochet Talk. Where else can you learn new crochet pointers and find friends that really really listen & laugh with you. We saw our grandson, Nick, for the first time in 5 days so now we don't have "Nicholas Withdrawal" anymore. (He had the flu). That made our day. Who would think a 12 y o kid would brighten your day so much? Judy

[MeerKat]

Landon, what kind of Mother did your Mom have?

[Landon]

Mother always made her mother out to be the bad guy, but she did that with almost everyone. My mother was a pathological liar, her family lives in Venezuela and back then, it wasn't as easy to communicate as it is nowadays. When I did see my grandmother, she didn't speak English and I hadn't learned Spanish yet. Grandmother died while I was a teenager. I do know that of Mother and her 7 siblings, my mother was the only one who had problems with her mother. I remember that my grandmother was very religious and I remember visiting her in her room and I had on a skirt. She told me to sit a different way because she thought the people on the TV could see into the room, LOL I never had the chance to get to know her very well and my grandfather died when I was 3.
On my Dad's side, his father died when my father was in his teens and his mother died when I was about 6.
I have lots of cousins on Mother's side who I am in touch with, I hear from them every so often. They have families and are busy but I hear from them from time to time.
I believe and I am saying this because once I found out that Mother was a sociopath, I read up on it through every thing I could get my hands on.
There is a theory on how sociopaths and psychopaths are formed. As far as I can tell, the only difference between those 2 is that the psychopath engages in criminal behavior. It seems that as a young child, there is a hugely traumatic event that the child does not recover from. Their emotional growth is stunted but as nature takes it;s course, they continue to grow and do grow up. Like a tree that is poorly pruned but it continues to grow even though it's natural path is altered.
There is another theory that there are significant brain differences and that is why they lack such significant emotional behavior.

At either rate, I am profoundly grateful that I am no longer living under her roof. I live under my roof and I gain a lot of freedom that way.

[Mixpixlix]

Currently, the psychological community makes little distinction between sociopath and psychopath. At one time the sociopaths were thought to have little empathy and could be emotionally cruel but weren't violent or sexually aggressive. Psychopaths were the ones the killed and did horrible things to other humans. Today the terms are pretty much used interchangeably. Whatever you call them, we need to find a way to stop them from becoming what they are.

It's very sad that too many kids are born into families were abuse is the norm and the adults in the home are parents only in the biological sense.

[Landon]

It is, it is tragic how some people grow up and not knowing any better continue the abuse by marrying an abuser. Not everyone has what it takes to face themselves and what they need to do to improve the quality of their lives or face the horrible things they have done.

The best way I know of to attempt to get the behavior stopped is to educate, educate, educate. Hopefully the folks who need help can get access to resources that can help them. It's a big problem and is more prevalent than most people realize. They can be teachers, priests. lawyers and many other professions. My Mother was a University Professor.

[Anaisa]

What's hard is what one also 'thinks' they deserve. I enabled my family because I THOUGHT I was to be a pawn...sighs; glad I learned that I am not, sorry it took so long.