Positive power of crocheting

[VirginiaO]

No need for replies; I'm not posting for pity--rather, this posting is more cathartic for me than anything else. I just thought I'd share that as my mother lay dying these past few weeks and during her resting or napping times, I was able to be quietly by her side, keep her company and my equanimity by crocheting for her--first a shawl, then a wheelchair lapghan, and finally the last small bed afghan I was ever to make for her. It spared her the need to talk or struggle to "be social" when she was SO tired or uncomfortable and helped me maintain a positive presence. Of course, those projects all took quite a bit longer than usual to finish because my mum's most favorite thing was to have her hair brushed when possible, her head stroked when not, with some alternating with foot & calf massages and handholding; and THOSE kept her happy and my hands joyfully busy for hours on end. Naturally, there were also long, loving conversations, prayers, tender sharings and, yes, even laughter; however, it was the crocheting that I think helped keep me 'together' when there was nothing else I could do for her with my hands (or the times my brothers were there also getting their share of 'hands-on' time, bless their tender hearts).
I have always felt/said that every project I've ever made (from simple little dishcloths to major blankets) has been stitched with love in every loop; but this came especially home to me these last few precious days. When I was a child, my mother lovingly sewed almost every piece of clothing I ever wore; I understand better than ever now the love invested in each and every one. [To this day (I'm 65!), I can remember the fabrics, colors, and styles of all those beautiful little dresses. Mum was nearly 90 when she passed.]
So, as so many of us are giving (or receiving) handmade items, may we all remember the love that went into every one and rejoice in their unique preciousness. As for me, I'll be wrapping her love around me with the memory of her last smile and the warmth of her last afghan.
God bless you all.

[MsBhaven]

God Bless you Virginia

[buggainok]

What loving, and lovely words you posted. A wonderful tribute to your mother. So happy you were able to be with her.

[MeerKat]

God Bless you. Your Mother was lucky to have such a loving daughter to take care of her. You would be surprised the people that won't take care of there parents.
But they are sure their when it time to get their estate. A dear friend of mine past away 2 days before Thanksgiving she was 88 and she lived alone and none would come and help her, she was doing her best to stay at home as long as she can. She had cancer and she had 2 sons and 1 daughter and they wouldn't come and help her. She was down to 70 Lbs. She stayed home by herself up until one week before she died.
I belive God has a special place for people who care and love their parents. I am sure you made your Mothers last days a lot better.

[LadyDi461]

Virginia, God bless you! I cried while I was reading your post, it was so beautifully expressed.

I lost my mother 12 years ago, and spent the last week with her in hospice. She was not really aware of who was there, but we made sure she was not alone. The memories we have are worth more than anyone can ever imagine. I still think of her every day, and miss her so much!

Thank you for sharing these thoughts with us. God bless you and give you peace!

[VirginiaO]

LadyDi, the fact that you can still cry is testimony to the depth of your love and her goodness. My father passed in 1976, and I still miss him as if it were just yesterday. From time to time, at the oddest moments, the least little thing can unexpectedly trigger the lump in the throat, a tightness in the chest, and--yes--even tears at his absence. We are blessed to have had such wonderful parents and experienced their love; there are way too many poor souls in this world who never know that kind of love and devotion. In THAT there IS peace and comfort. God bless you, too, sweetie.

[little drummer]

Virginia, I cried when I was reading your post. I'm glad that you had that special time with your mother before she passed. Remember-those we love don't go away, they walk beside us everyday. I am praying God will give you comfort and strength in the days ahead.

[Susan2014]

Virginia as I just saw this on 1/01/14 will be a magical moment of every thing I do or think. I don't have the same inner feelings as you do BUT Dad was & is allways with me passed in 1963 and Mom passed 1995 along with my older Brother. She was a wonderful Mother I just have no memories ( God & a Dr are helping me as I asked recently I need to know WHY NOT (Im 73) etc as I could write a Novel. Your gift of words and Thought of Your Life is Touching.

HUGS & Prayers
Susan MJ

[Jean Marie]

Hi Virginia,
I'm sorry you lost your Mom.
Jean

[Susie Ann]

crocheting and reading helped me a lot when my daughter age 19 fought leukemia for 2 years She died at 21 in 1995 than mom followed her end of January and dad in March Now my husband has lung cancer (thu he never smoked--it was second hand smoke at work) I don't know what I would do without God--my grown up kids--grandkids--reading and crocheting and gardening. So I have a lot of blessings too. It is just sometimes like now I feel this scared falling apart feeling. It does go away but it sneaks up and me now and than. So I pray and it helps. I think it has a lot to do with everything changing all the time. Sometimes I just want to scream and tell everything to stop --I am not ready for the next thing. But God is faithful --He keeps putting me together again or the grandkids give me a hug. Lots of people can keep it all in but it helps me to talk--wish I didn't need to do that.